You CAN Break Free from the “Holy Handcuffs” of Ministry
Pastors, Discover How You Can Leave the Ministry & Recover Your Calling
(Without losing your Mission, your Marriage, or your Mind.)
But, First One Thing
(Before you get mad or call me something ugly online)
The goal of this course is to provide support, NOT to pull pastors away from fruitful and rewarding ministries or the churches they love.
In churches across the western world, anywhere from 35% to over 60%* of pastors are thinking about or planning to leave the ministry to pursue other work. The reasons are as unique as the pastors themselves.
If that’s you, this resource is designed to help you leave well and enter your new career, job, or marketplace ministry fully prepared to succeed. If not, I may have some insight for staying too.
Transitions from ministry to another job or career are not just normal, they are BIBLICAL.
The early church saw leaders fill roles for a season and then move on to secular work or another calling. The most obvious example is Paul working from time to time making tents.
The church has often failed to support and guide pastors who pivot to secular business or work. In some traditions, leaving is stigmatized or even seen as a failure. I believe that leaving the ministry may hold the greatest potential for local and global Kingdom impact in generations.
Cuff-Breaker Podcast
I recently had the honor of recording a podcast with my friend Michael Cusick from Restoring the Soul. It was my first chance to share No Holy Handcuffs, and the platform I pray will bring healing and hope to pastors ready to leave the ministry. Much of NHH is rooted in my experience staffing Restoring the Soul Weekend Intensives. There is a brighter future ahead. There is nothing wrong with you. And you are not alone.
When it’s time to move on from the ministry to a new job or career, how do you leave well when there’s NO clear path to follow?
TL;DR - This is some of my own journey and why I’m doing this. You can skip ahead here.
Hi, I’m Kevin Tracy. In early 2015, I was asked to resign (let go) from the church where I had served as a missions pastor for five years. I made a ton of mistakes looking for the way forward, so you don’t have to. There is a process to do it well.
It was a normal monthly lunch at Red Robin with the Sr. Pastor. As he paid the waitress, he said, “the church is going a different direction, and you won’t be a part of it. Let’s go back to the office; I need you to sign some papers. Oh, and you can’t mention this to anyone.”
It seemed to come out of nowhere. At the time, I was almost 50 and the main provider for our family with four kids in Jr. High and High School. I was terrified.
The culture at church was becoming toxic, and I was planning to leave, but not for several months. I still had to make a plan to “leave well,” but things can change fast. With no time to waste, I dove into research (I’m an Enneagram 5/4) and looked for a map or a path forward. HOW do I restart a dormant career without destroying everything I love in the process? There wasn’t one, so I made my own.
Hundreds of resources, programs, courses, degrees, and coaches are ready and willing to help professionals move from their occupations into full-time ministry.
BUT...
There are virtually no resources, programs, courses, or coaches to move from full-time ministry to a professional, non-ministry career or occupation. I’m sure I missed some in my searching, wrong key words, not scrolling down past page ten of the results, etc. I expected to find at least a few, but they weren’t there.
Why Not?
When I entered the ministry, there were resources everywhere, support, and encouragement everywhere.
When I left the ministry, it was sudden and unexpected. We had four teenagers at home; I was the breadwinner for my family and had no warning. The shock left me scrambling for clues to my next step. How would I feed my family? How would I make a living? Would my wife divorce me?
What kind of career could I find that would replace a pastor’s salary after 20+ years away from my last real job? (And what about all those pastors whose only career has been in the ministry?) Once I signed the documents, the church washed its hands of us, except to encourage us to continue to attend and, of course, tithe.
I Googled everything I could think of and got…
Crickets.
Nothing came up when I searched for how to successfully jump from full-time ministry to a secular profession except for a few small sites with basic resume tips and a handful of coaches. Mixed in were pages and pages of resources to help return to the ministry, but nothing that could help me leave well.
I was luckier than many ex-pastors. I had a career before I entered the ministry, as did my wife. I had a successful track record at small firms and corporations like Hallmark. And, I had kept my skills up even while we lived overseas as missionaries and worked as a pastor here in the states.
That was then, this is now.
Years ago, moving from corporate work to the ministry, I was an “ideal” candidate and we had plenty of help to make the shift. Now, going the other way, I felt overwhelmed, scared, and completely alone.
With no help from the church, I searched for wisdom and direction from the world. (See Luke 16:8) There is plenty of rich content online, too much at times. I watched hours of Tony Robbins and discovered experts like Darren Hardy and a vast list of resources to help change careers, upgrade, grow, or launch a business.
My reading list with the coaches and experts I follow have only continued to expand. And with it so has my admiration for the men and women who are using businesses, entrepreneurship, and their professions to impact the world for good and for the Kingdom.
No hard feelings.
When I let my guard down, I grew disappointed with the Body of Christ. To be honest, at times, I let those feelings drift into bitterness.
I was struggling. I wanted help and needed wisdom and direction. The only ones supplying it were the professionals whose ranks I wanted to join. They were overwhelmingly generous, open, positive, and encouraging.
The ones I wanted to hear from—other pastors, churches, seminaries, BAM (Business as Mission) groups, and mission organizations—had little wisdom to offer. I don’t say that as a criticism; they simply do not focus on that aspect of ministry life.
Maybe we have been focused so much on helping people get into the ministry, that the idea of someone leaving doesn’t compute, (or the thought of helping someone get out is simply too scary to face).
Regardless, it’s happening, and the best thing we can do is help the transition become a powerful door for growth, open to both the pastors who are leaving, and the churches they love.
The obstacle is the way.
Leaving the ministry and entering the workforce may be one of the toughest things you ever do. It’s all too easy to get lost in the “messy middle” of the journey.
I created the Breaking Holy Handcuffs framework in the hope that no one would ever be stuck in that place again. The obstacles along the way truly became the best teachers of all.
I remember packing up our family and moving to Lima, Peru for missions. It was hard, but we watched obstacles shrink or disappear with every new step .
Moving from ministry to full time work again took more faith and more time. The hurdles were higher, and so were the stakes. But now, in hindsight, the process is remarkably similar.
There is a way forward.
Are you up for the challenge? If the only thing keeping you from tendering your two-week notice is fear of the unknown, there’s less to be frightened of than you might think.
If God is moving you to leave and recover the calling and vision that first drew you into ministry, then even scary things can turn into unexpected fuel for success.
Moving from the ministry to business has been the greatest challenge I’ve ever faced. The move demands every bit as much faith as missions and (then some).
If you’re ready to step out into the unknown, there is a process that can save time, money, and even a few tears. You can get started today.
Are You Ready?
Two Questions You Need to Answer Before You Do Anything.
Why Now?
This one’s critical. In the fog of spiritual warfare, it’s scary easy to get distracted, confused, and upside down making decisions. I know, I’ve been there. I got the scars and the t-shirt. I have spoken with enough pastors in truly dark places around the world to know it’s part of the package, and it’s an honor to carry that weight.
But, sometimes, the pain and pressure are something else, and it’s time to move on. If you’re in the fog right now, it may be time to leave, or it may be time to get help. I put together a quiz to help bring some clarity to your decision.
Click the button below to take the 3-Minute Why Quiz. I’ll send the results to your inbox and suggest helpful next steps.
Where Next?
This question is almost as important as the first. How will this next evolution in mission and calling look? Where do you see yourself two, five, or ten years from today? To quote Tony Robbins, “Most people overestimate what they can accomplish in one year, but massively underestimate what they can accomplish in one decade.”
To help jump-start the process, I created a free What’s Next Framework to bring some structure to what feels like an opaque and confusing future. I desperately needed some type of system to frame the mountain of decisions and questions I faced.
Click the button below and I’ll send you the What Next Framework you can print out at home, with steps you can take today.
Still Not Sure if This is For You?
I get it. This may be one of the most difficult decisions you will ever make. If you’re open to the possibility, I’ve set aside 20 minutes for a personal call—phone or Zoom—to see if this is a good fit for you and where you want to go from here.
Click the link below and pick a time that works for you. If you made this far down the page, you may be ready to take the first step out of church ministry and into an amazing new chapter of God’s bigger story for your life.
So, what’s with the “Holy Handcuffs” thing?
Maybe you’ve read about executives who talked about their “golden parachute,” an amazing retirement package that comes with the C-Suite office. Several of them also describe the “golden handcuffs” that come with the parachute.
They keep executives chained to the companies they lead. The benefits are so good they eventually turn into shackles. If they leave, they lose it all. At some point, I realized the same dilemma exists for pastors.
The perks of ministry are usually not golden, especially in smaller churches. But, that’s not a bad thing; there are beautiful and unique, if intangible, benefits to a ministry calling that you can’t get anywhere else. Besides, you probably didn’t become a pastor to get rich; you were looking for something eternal.
The downside for pastors who want out is two-fold. For many whose only career has been in the ministry, job prospects in the marketplace are limited due to a perceived lack of real-world experience and no business-focused degrees. (Luckily, that’s starting to change.)
On top of that, a certain stigma is attached to leaving your ministry, especially with so many high-profile pastors falling in disgrace. The unspoken question is, “what did you do?”
It can put pastors in a position where they feel trapped in a role that may have only been for a season, not a lifetime. They need to break free from their “Holy Handcuffs” so they can move on with dignity and grace. That’s my prayer for you. There’s never been a better time to make the move.